Today is today

I haven't been updating this blog too much. I'm not even sure why. Nothing much going
on lately. Just the usual work and sleep issues, headaches and reality shows, rain and odd
warm winter weather. I have been eating a little much though, we cooked japanese style
hamburger steak the other night- I think we're going to use the rest of the meat and make
it again tonight, and also tonjiru soup. Today we found this little bakery a few miles from
the apt. It was really cute and they had such yummy pastries! We had the open face egg
sandwich on cranberry bread and turkey sandwich on sourdough. I picked up some
pastries too, they were so so good! What's happening to me? I've been so hungry lately.
Is it all these food blogs all over the net?? Tempting me to cook and eat, eat and cook?


Anyway, I better get some work done. Just dropped off my film at rite aid. There's this
one guy that does the photos pretty good and he was there. But they DID just get a new machine so
I'm a little nervous about how these canon ae-1 shots will come out! My first roll i've
shot w/ this camera and I'm really excited! He said they'll be ready at 6:30 and it's 4:43 now.
Not exactly one hour photo but whatever. I'm just grateful they got their lab back!!!
I was dying, having to go all the way to the other one. Don't want to pay for Green Street
either. I just need the negatives. Nothing fancy.

Okay. I gotta go. Hope you're having a good week. OH WAIT! It's Friday!!! Happy Friday!
I completely forgot! Now I'm REALLY excited. Have a good weekend, people :)

Be Mine

Wow. Had a really nice day today. Woke up and Ron surprised me with roses, which was completely
unexpected. Thank you, Ron. Sat around for a few hours and ate mac + cheese, cut the stems and
put the roses in a vase, which is sitting comfortably on the living room table.

I really wanted to get out of the house today. It was actually all i've been thinking about all week long.
We took a long walk around the block. Watched the metro pass, browsed through a few thrift stores,
window shopped and drooled over some old china and jadite bowls and cups, took photos, and drank
coffee at a cute little coffee shop across from the library. There were a pack of birds flying back and
forth between the trees at the coffee shop, they looked like parrots but I wasn't sure what they were.
There were so many of them, and they were so loud. Then the sun started to go down, so we walked
back. I couldn't have asked for a better Valentines Day. :)

Hope you had a great day as well. xoxo

Dinner + a beverage

Ate dinner at Islands tonight, I feel a little sick now. Had chicken strips and some french
fries and a vodka tonic. Should've went next door to Kabuki and had some Udon. Oh well.
We sat, talked and watched some of the speed skating on the olympics. They were playing
it at Islands. Did you know I took speed skating for 3 years? Crazy. I miss it sometimes.

Ron's watching the Michael Jackson dvd. I had to put my headphones on and blast music
into my brain. I can't watch it, I just don't want to feel sad. Don't think I'm ready to watch
it yet, as crazy as that may sound.

Tomorrow is Valentines Day. I'm gonna try to get out of the house during the day tomorrow.
You think I can do it?? Wish me luck :)

FRIDAY

I was tagged by Juli to take a pic within 5 minutes and upload it to flickr.

Thank god I wasn't wearing the usual uniform (Ron's oversized faded & ugly UCLA tee). Well that
was fun, now I should try and get SOMETHING done today. I feel extra extra lazy. Happy weekend
to you all.

What are you doing for V.day? Anything at all?

Dreaming of spring

Another night on the computer.

Another night making chicken breasts stuffed with cheddar cheese and asparagus. More
magazine reading and lack of putting clothes away.

Gonna try and read tonight.

Ochazuke + Pellengrino

Ron had some Ochazuke for lunch. I ate my lunch (a small portion of Ravioli) too fast to
photograph. We're on "lunch break" right now, watching the MLB network and trying to
relax. My head hurts really bad today, our room collects dust so quickly! I really want to
move out of this place, we've been here for over a year and 1/2. Isn't that crazy? It feels
like we were just building Ikea furniture and eating in the dark from power outages.

Here's a quick how-to recipe + ingredients for Ochazuke, before I forget:

Ingredients you can use:
-------------------
Left over Rice
Genmai cha, Hoji cha or Jasmine tea.
Pickled Vegetables (pickled carrots, onions, ginger, etc)
Dashi or a little vegetable stock
Optional Toppings (you could also get an ochazuke toppings packet):
Some Rice crackers or Arare
Soy Sauce
Nori (toasted seaweed)
Cubed Tofu
Fried Egg
Peas
Green Onion
Ume Boshi (pickled plum)
Bean Sprouts
Toasted Sesame seeds
Wasabi (horseradish)
Rice vinegar
Bonito flakes (flakes of tuna)
Furikake (rice sprinkles?)
Fish
Konbu (a type of seaweed)
Shiso (a purple herb that is sort of like basil and oregano)
Jako (tiny dried fish)
Left over steamed vegetables
Pieces of steak



Directions (really quick and easy):
--------------------------
Scoop some rice in a bowl
Put toppings on rice
Pour Hot tea over rice and toppings, the same amount you might put in cereal.
Eat.

4:30am

For the past few months, I haven't really been into clothing much. Not like I use to be, that's
for sure. I think it was my job back in Hawaii that made me start liking clothes so much. Constantly
having to look at fashion blogs and keep up with what's new and upcoming. It was a good job, living
in my little quarters, in my little purchase order fort. I miss having my own work area and browsing
websites on given days, just for "research". I however, do NOT miss: flying, inventory and getting sick
from all that dust back in the warehouse, doing other peoples jobs- jobs that are so ridiculous you your-
self would be like 'WHAAT?', driving around without reimbursement, salary and working way over my
hours, open and closing stores- which took 18 hours a day for 3 days straight, people telling you that
you can sell more when the economy is in shambles, sales reps on your ass, the telephone on monday
mornings, bosses, and the list just goes on and on. What I do love about that job is, you can
leave it behind. It's a hard concept to grasp if you haven't self-managed yourself before. I find so much
more stress in never separating work from home. Your office is literally steps away from you. You
have a random idea at 5 am, laying in your bed staring at the ceiling and feel compelled to jump up
and write it down but wake yourself up in the process. You end up milling around the house opening
the fridge a hundred times just because you're bored. It never ends when you set your own schedules.
If I don't get up, get ready, put on make up and drink something, I will seriously just feel completely groggy
and unmotivated. I'm mentally screwed for the day when this happens.

Today started off good and progressively went downhill. By lunch time, I was shaking my head at
random things and trying to focus on the screen in front of me. It wasn't working. Too many things
clogging up the focusing ring in the depths of my mind. I need to separate all of the craziness
that gets to me, from what I'm working on. It's an uphill battle currently, and I want it to stop. Or
slow. Either of the two would be fine/great.

During the afternoon, I started going through magazines and came across some cute mens button
ups in the Joker Magazine. I know it's mens, but that means absolutely nothing to me. I wear mens
clothing all the time. Even when I try to get myself out of tomboy mode, it's a little hard. I always
revert back to the same old same.

Also came across some nice mens shoes. I liked the colors and the way the photographer shot the
product.

Tonight I decided to use Nicole's recipe for fried noodles and make some from beef ichiban ramen.
I asked Ron to pick up oyster sauce and ramen and got everything ready. Cut up spam and threw
in the shoyu and instant ramen sauce packet (1/2) and finished. It was SO SO salty!!!! I definitely
did something very wrong. I'm still extremely thirsty, hours later! I guess it was my first time and
all, but I don't like making mistakes. Hopefully next time I can make it better. Possibly less oyster
sauce and shoyu after I throw in the boiled noodles.

Tomorrow/tonight we're going to make stuffed chicken w/ cheese and asparagus again. One of
our favorites and it's easy to bake. I'm starting to get hungry just writing about all this stuff.
Also, I used an old camera for these pics. The Canon Powershot. I don't like the width and height
it makes the images but it's easy to carry around and I'm not afraid to hurt it or ruin it at all. It
also has a flash and is really light w/ a f/2.0. So I was thinking of just taking it around with me instead of
my clunky slr. Sometimes anyway.

Reflection

I've been going through some violent ups and downs lately. I feel like I'm constantly battling
myself to stay positive and telling myself it's going to get better. The truth is, I really don't know
when it will, and it makes me feel petty because I KNOW that it could be a lot worse. A lot lot
worse.

I've been in Los Angeles for over a year and haven't met any new friends. I work from home
so it's really hard to be social. Also, it feels like the older I get, the harder it is for me to meet
people who are on the same page as me. All I like to do is hang out, drink tea or coffee or eat
and just talk for hours. Doesn't take much to make me happy really (surprise surprise), but at
this point in time, it seems completely impossible to make new friends. Is it Los Angeles? Is
it ME? A combination of both? It gets so lonely here in the office/apartment, I miss being able
to laugh. I miss it a lot.

Anyway, that's my rant for the day. Kinda depressing. Sorry. Ehh.

Looking Back

I was going through old photos and came across our engagement photos, taken back in
Hawaii before we moved up here to California. My friend from high school actually asked
if we'd be interested in taking photos for free so her boyfriend could build his portfolio.
I told her yes and we met up down on the West side of Oahu to take some before Sunset.
I haven't seen these in a long time. They weren't edited at all, so I just edited them. I also
realized that I don't have the full res copies of them. He just gave me a low res folder on
disk and I didn't notice the file sizes till tonight. It's okay though :) I'm happy to even have
engagement shots. It's nice to look back on. Reminds me of planning for our wedding,
quitting my job I was at for 8 years and packing our life up to move to Los Angeles.
A lot of goods and bads were mixed into all of that chaos, but in the end, in retrospect,
these photos give me a happy feeling and that's all that really matters.

Love is a funny thing. It makes all the bad just disappear. Saisho kara- saigo made.

Goodnight, world.

Away from the city lights

I've been thinking a lot about that trip we took (down North) last weekend. I keep seeing the
blue skies in my head, with the fresh scent of lavender and freshly cut grass. The sounds of
the crows overhead in the skeleton-like trees, the subtle cries- reaching over the wooden
fences, causing the horses to snort and kick up dirt. I love the country side, I really love every-
thing about it. If only we could just live there forever, if we had the option, I wouldn't think
twice.

Today has been a long day that sped by extra fast. Started editing photos at 2pm and next
thing I knew, it was 8pm and my stomach was calling for food. Whipped up some vegetarian
chili and heated up some rice we had leftover from the night I made shoyu chicken for Nicole.
Ron asked me to cook some gyoza so I threw a bunch into the pan and cooked that up too.
I wasn't too fond of the chili but the gyoza was really good.

Now I'm just up editing a little more and thinking about reading that Ann Rice book I bought in
Hawaii. It's kind of hard to get into, but maybe if I force myself through the beginning it'll be
okay.

I've been so tired lately. I just can't seem to shake this feeling.

Tous les garcons et les filles

3 days and 2 nights

Well, the weekend is now over. My sister came over to visit from Hawaii for a few days and now
she's gone. Her visits always go by so fast, it's not fair. On a happy note: it was exactly what I
needed to lighten my spirits. These past months have been extremely hard, and just when you
think the cycle can only go up, a new downward spiral begins and drags you back down into
that deep dark hole again.

Thanks, Nicole. I had a lot of fun, I wish you were still here.

Highlights of the trip include:
-Hollywood Diner
-Pancakes + Quarter jukebox songs
-Del Taco macho tacos and spicy chicken burritos
-Krispy Cream donuts for dinner
-Avatar and popcorn and getting lost in the theater
-Lots of rain while freezing in Westwood, getting Ice Cream sandwiches
-Furaibo. Sitting on the floor drinking warm soup
-Talking till sunrise and making stop-motion videos
-Spicy Ocrochan ramen + the best fried rice ever
-Japanese book store. Little trinkets and Marukai (wishing I bought that sparkly nail polish)
-Ikea. Nicole bought a lot of cute lil things.
-La Brea. Vintage stores. Mc Donalds bathrooms (crazy)
-Urban Outfitters. Glendale mall and eiffel tower parking garages
-Fried noodle recipes (Thank you)
-Cooking shoyu chicken for Nic. Late night Pavillion + Bristol farms run
-Champagne and "Scent Of A Woman" on T.V
-Computer and Reality Shows

Back to reality tomorrow. Try to get as much done as I possibly can. Goodnight.

brief sneak

Here's a sneak peek of a new project I've been working on. Still putting my
website together so hopefully I'll be able to post everything up here soon :)

I can't wait! So very excited for new ventures & beginnings!

Goodnight, friends.

Migraines + Final edits.

So guess what? I might have a wedding gig in May. May 1st. I still have to discuss
everything with the couple, so I'm crossing my fingers in hopes it all works out. Cross
your fingers for me pleeease.

In other news: HOLY MIGRAINE!

And in other news: MY SISTER IS COMING IN ONE DAY!

I'm excited.

Hooray for today.

Goodnight, my 3-4 friends that actually read this blog :)

Engagements + Dutch pancakes

Been on a mini hiatus lately. Trying to finish up some existing deadlines and also
trying to relax a little.

This weekend we went north to take some engagement photos. Stayed in this little inn
and ate dutch pancakes in the morning w/ coffee, eggs and bacon. yes yes bacon. and
it was SO good. Stopped off at a little bakery next store and Ron picked up a chocolate
chip cookie for the road.

We got some really good stuff & I'm actually happy with the results! Now my whole body
is sore, as if I just had a full-body workout. Going to take a hot bath and practice my
Japanese. Been practicing Katakana every night (except last night because we weren't at
home) and am finally starting to remember things. All the hiragana is coming back and
I figured out the difference between using "GA" and "WA". The fun continues, I know.

I better head to the bath. I feel exhausted. Hope everyone had a good weekend! :) xx